Monday, April 9, 2012

Joyfulness and Satisfaction

So as of lately I have felt an overwhelming sense of joy and satisfaction with my life.  Was it turning 40? Or was it just the fact that somethings are being revealed to me on a more regular basis that I'm open to accepting?  I have for sure decided to be more easy going, accepting differences in others and also not putting myself in situations just to make others happy or not to rock the boat!  I'm tired of living on egg shells.  So maybe it was turning forty that has given me this new sense of self but I love it!!!
  I have an amazing husband who takes great care of me and our family.  We love to be together and we love to have fun with our kids.  It amazes me how many parents, moms and dads who really don't interact with their kids, for example lets say at the beach.  They take them out and then they are expected to entertain themselves for hours on end without a parent even going into the water with them.  I can't imagine it!  Seriously, I don't lovvvveeee the ocean water but I do have to pee sometimes therefore  I have to go into the water.  Why not take the time to actually get in and splash around in the waves for a bit with the kids?  They love it and they think you are amazing!  It really doesn't take more than that.  Kids will then be very happy and play along the beach knowing their parents played with them.  And if you do let the kiddos go out a little further they know you will come out on occasion to play and then go back to doing whatever they were doing before.  I've been at the beach with families that don't play in the water with their kids and the kids will literally attack any adult that comes out.  REALLY?  Kids need attention and they crave it from their own parents but will take it from whomever they can get it from.  Very sad not to mention ANNOYING!!! I want to play with my own kid not yours.  Just because you brought them out doesn't make you a great parent you have to teach them how to play. You can't do that laying on the beach tending to your tan. Urghhhh! 
  Anyway I look forwards to spending more time with my amazing kids on the beach this summer and knowing I'm blessed beyond and so are my kids!  We may not have tons of money to buy entertainment but we do give them lots of attention, teach them how to swim and how to behave. Some of the best gifts in life.

  On another note I have finally lost the Christmas weight I put on in December!  It only took 3 months!  I won't be taking a two week break again anytime soon.  I'm trying to implement more real foods into my diet and it seems that you really do have to eat a ton more food if your going to eat real foods that are low in fat and carbs.  I'm loving it though. 
Have a blessed day.

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Checking in

Finally!  The scale moved in the right direction!!! 2 lbs down.  So the official weigh in was 142.  Thank goodness.  My measurements were good also.
-1/2" upper chest
-1" midriff
-1/4" waist
-1/2"upper hips
-1/2"lower hips
So that's the good news!  Very satisfied with that this week.  I hope the scale will go down again next Monday.  I've been really watching my portions and the fat in take.  Trying to cut some calories although that's not as important when doing low-carb.

Very excited to share that I tried some new things.  First I don't think I've shared about trying spin class.  It was awesome!  What a great workout with lots of sweat!  I've done it twice now.  I know I will continue to throw it in once or twice a week.  The other thing I tried was goat cheese.  I made these really yummy quesadillas I found on Pinterest.  Here's the the link http://sugarcooking.blogspot.com/2010/02/chicken-spinach-goat-cheese-quesadillas.html


I think mine look really yummy!  I could go for one right now!
Omgoodness!!!! This was one really yummy quesadilla!  The tip about toasting the inside first was a real winner!  I will remember that for the future.  I also made a couple of changes.  To stay with low-carb I used low-carb tortillas and instead of avocados I used fresh guacamole.  I will be eating this again.
  Bad news is this, my darling hubby has been really interested in homesteading or backyard farming for awhile now.  He really thought having a goat for cheese would be essential.  Guess what?  He doesn't like goat cheese! Hahaha! So my experiment went really well for my diet options but not so well for my hubby's hopes and dreams.  Oh well.  If you have any suggestions on goat cheese I would love to hear them.  He said the kind I got, crumbles, is a fresher cheese and maybe a harder cheese might be better for him?  I don't know about this.  I just bought the only goat cheese I saw at the store. What other kinds are there?

Let me know if you try this and if you have any changes you really like.  I love quesadillas so variations are always encouraged.

Enjoy
Deanna

Monday, January 30, 2012

Monday Morning Madness

Found this on my obsession, Pinterest. 
This was on my mind this morning! Should have listened to the wiser!  I didn't want to get on but thought I better keep up with my accountability!  URGH!!! Ok I didn't cry but I don't want to do anything now.  I have been working my tail off to no availl!  The only saving grace is that I had the good sense to take my measurement last Monday!  Thank goodness.  So even though the scale goes up or stays the same, I've actually lost in inches.

3/4" off my bust
1" off midriff
1/4" off the small of my waist
1/2" off my lower abdomen(baby pooch)
3/4" off my upper thigh
1/4" off my lower thigh
These are very encouraging.  I know with low-carb your body will hold on to weight for a long time before letting it go.  I don't understand this but I know it to be true.  It's so important to not only look to the scale for signs but also other forms of measurements.

I didn't make it to the gym this morning due to not being prepared!  I know better.  The excuse:  I didn't do my own laundry.  Sorry not going to the gym in 3 day old stinky workout clothes.  My solution:  Go buy some more workout gear, an outfit for each day. LOL!  Is that frugal?  I wonder if not doing so much laundry would actually save us money in the long run!!!Hahaha.  Yes that's going to be my reasoning.  Wonder what hubby's feelings would be on that.


Now I would like to share a happy topic SPRING IS ON IT'S WAY!!! How I know this is our beautiful flowers have started to bloom.  I know they are winter bloomers but they are a sign of things on the horizon.  I love Spring and these are one of the only things I love about living in the middle of our country. Yeah I'm not a lover of Texas but I'll take what I can get.   And these are always a place of beauty.  They seem to show up right when I've just about had enough of the cold.  I'm ready to get my hands in to the dirt and plant some beautiful works of art by my Creator.  How can you look at these and not feel the peacefulness of God's great creations?

Have a blessed Monday!
Hugs,
Deanna

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Family ties

Isn't this a true statement!  My daughter (15yrs) picked this out for me over the Christmas camping trip we went on to Austin.  It has to have been one of the best family times we have ever had.  We were all together, which being a blended family sometimes doesn't happen.  This in of it self made it special but the fact that we all had such a great time made it the best ever!  Together we have it all!  We aren't perfect, none of us, not me and my amazing hubby as parents, not our teens who have made some poor choices and not our littlest one's who are on the road of trying to find out the boundaries.  Our family has had it's bumps but we have recovered from them and we will continue to have bumps that we will eventually recover from.  But I love when we all come together.  A funny story about this trip, it was the first one our now adult, sorta, child came with us.  Trev hasn't lived with us for two years now and since we got the camper last summer he hadn't gone with us.  We also hadn't gone in the cold yet.  So here we are in a new park, very excited to go explore and we set up camp.  We go to bed, nothing new, didn't pay any attention to how cold it was going to drop during the night and we wake up FREEZING!  We hadn't ever used our heater, never needed to.  So we can SEE our breath inside the camper!!! We're blowing hot air out as if to warm the inside of the camper.  We are all laughing uncontrollably with chattering teeth, not because it's funny at the time but because we can't seem to get the heater on quick enough and then the fire alarms go off due to the heater's fumes.  It had never been used before so it smelled really bad.  As miserable as we all were it was a great moment!  Trev had only two little blankets and he's a 6'4" man.  This wasn't probably what he had expected as his first camping experience with us.  Welcome to our exploring Trev!  Good Times!  We all managed to defrost by a fire they quickly got started and got the heater to run for the rest of our trip.  It never got that cold again but at least we know it works now.

Today was Joe's baseball try outs.  Neither one of his dad's could be there but both his moms were.  We sat together and were excited for him, nervous for him and disappointed for him when he didn't do as well as he would have liked.  It was good.  Our other children ran around the baseball fields like they do every season but this year will be different.  We will have the loudest cheering section for him.  He always does but maybe this year it will be in sync.  It will be harmonious.  I'm excited to watch the boys play but I'm even more excited that the previous tension during baseball will no longer exist!  It will be only about Joe and not about being uncomfortable.  I can't wait to share more about how this goes.

So again FAMILY, we may not have it all together but together we have it all.  I know some might not agree that we are family but we have family ties.  My stepson has brothers at his other home and he has brothers at our home.  They all like each other and get along.  This will tie us together.  It's good for Joe.  I believe its good for all the boys to see the adults get along and that Joe doesn't have to have loyalties that separate his homes.  I hope that he will be able to go easily between the two homes or even enjoy his brothers all together if he chooses.  That way he can have it all together if he wants.  I'm not saying the adults will all get together but when we are together we can all be proud of how our families enjoy each other.  That sounds great to me.

Just my thoughts for today.
Hugs,
Deanna

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Cream Puff Love

I'm pretty excited about this!  My mom makes this super yummy dessert that is a take on a cream puff.  I love it.  Everyone I know that has ever had a piece of the dessert loves it.  So in my interest to continue living as close to normal when it comes to my eating I thought I would try to make a low carb version of it.  I believe I nailed it!  My hubby loved it and I loved it!  Even my little one wanted to eat more.

I have to say it is NOT low calorie or low in fat.  I replaced the milk with a mixture of whipping cream and water.  I probably could have reduced even the amount of cream by using more water and I probably will next time.  I also tried replacing the flour with Soy flour.  It has a different consistency than regular flour but it worked.  So here's a picture of this luscious lovely.
Directions:
Cream Puff-
Bring to boil 1C. of water & 1stick of butter.  All at once add 1C. of the Soy flour and mix vigorously.  Take off heat, let cool slightly and beat in 4 eggs, one at a time, till thick and smooth.  This part didn't come out the same as it does with a cup of all-purpose flour.  But I didn't give up.  I actually made 8 blobs on a cookie sheet and poured the rest into a greased 8x8 pan.  Bake at 400 degrees for 20-30min. till golden brown,  and crossed my fingers.  The consistency was more like runny pudding than the usual thick dough that comes out.  To my surprise it still worked.  We made 8 pastries that in the future I will use for breakfast sandwiches, muffins, anything we would want bread for and a cake. And I divided the pan into 9 servings.

Custard filling-
Beat soften 8oz. cream cheese
Add 1 1/2 cups of whipping cream 
and 1cup of water mix till blended
Add 1lrg. box of sugar free vanilla pudding
Beat 1minute and let stand for 15min.
Spoon on to crust and top with whipped topping.

I didn't use all the custard on the cake.  I just use enough to cover it and estimated that each serving has 1/4c.
Here's the nutrition facts I came up with:
1/4 C. of custard is
119.5 cal.
21  fat
2.44 carbs
less than a gram of protein

17 servings of pastry-
per serv.-
75.29 Cal.
6.5g. fat
1.88g. carbs
(1.17countable carbs)
2.35g. protein

If you would like the totals for each recipe so then you can divide it up as you wish please let me know and I will send you that information.
I highly recommend this dessert.  You can also drizzle Magic Shell Chocolate and let it set up in the refrigerator.  And if you don't want low carb just use all purpose flour instead of the soy and use milk for the whipping cream/water.

You will be a hit with this dessert!

Let me know if you try it.
Hugs,
Deanna



Monday, January 23, 2012

Marvelous Monday- Sorta

My hubby is back home where he belongs!  The kids and I drove up to the airport yesterday to pick him up after an unplanned visit to his parents.  His father went into the hospital for a possible stroke, he felt an obligation and his heart strings pulling him to make a visit.  I'm glad he went and I'm even happier he's back.  Yeah back to normal.  Last week was an intersting journey for me with lots of mixed emotions.  I want to share but I'm still processing how to share without sounding totally unreasonable and bitchy. Hahaha, it might not be possible but until I'm ready to share what I learned through this process I will hold on to it.  That's why I didn't mention it last week.  By the way I want to mention I am married to the most amazing man!  He's more of a man than I can handle sometimes.  I am blessed.

Now on to more important things!!!Like my relationship with the scale!  It's not even hate any more.  I think it's more like a totally disgust, physical repulsion and a total feeling of wanting to attack it like it's a walker from the Walking Dead! (Love that show and can't wait for Feb. 12)  I just want to smash it's head in with some kind of blunt tool!  The reality is I weighed 143.2!  Yes another pound up!!! I worked my ass off last week with my hubby gone.  I went to the gym twice on Wed and I'm in full fledged ketosis!  My ketone stick has been dark red to even purple.  For those of you who don't know about the pee sticks, they tell you if your body is using its own fat for energy.  Ketones are put off when fat is used for energy meaning I'm burn fat for fuel! (This is a very juvenile description but straight to the point.) I love those little sticks!  So I'm going to stay where I'm at and I've decided to continue to stick with the strict diet and up my cardio and lower my weight training for now.

I did take my measurements, another rude awakening!  But I know on low carb sometimes the scale refuses to move but the measurements don't.  So even though I should have done this in the beginning, it again gives me another form of measurement to keep me going.  I'm not going to share those numbers but I will tell you about my changes.
Loved this and wish I could give credit to who posted it.



And I won't be giving up!  I don't know where my balance is yet but I will find it.  I want to adjust to the middle ground.

Have a wonderful Tuesday.  I'm going to be posting about some sorta yummy low-carb breakfast danishes. LOL!
Hugs,
Deanna

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Unexpected friendship

So I finished out the week with two great classes at the gym along with spending the afternoon with JM(my stepson Joe's mom).  I haven't been to her house in awhile and it was nice just to spend time talking about girl stuff and playing with her baby.  He's one of the cutest baby's ever! And so happy all the time.  Anyway she and I have been trying to encourage each other at the gym.  Since I worked so hard to lose all my weight in the first place I don't want to ever go back.  But this leads me to having to always think about my lifestyle choices.  She on the other hand is very petite and having had a baby a year ago is trying to lose that baby weight.  She's decided to join a competition at the gym and I decided to opt out.  I lost it all on my own and I just can't justify spending a hundred dollars to lose 10lbs. Oh and I am still trying to be frugal.  Hahahaha. But what I will be doing is using all her new knowledge and excitement to help motivate me even more. 

Sometimes spending that much time with her feels odd.  We were enemies just over a year ago.  I put up the white flag last Christmas but she wasn't ready.  I totally understand.  This friendship is odd but is comfortable when I don't worry about who I am or who she is.  Just be me and accept her too.  God is on my side and I know that I have only the best of intentions in seeking a friendship with her.  I like her company.  It's unique.  I feel blessed to have a heart that is willing to be open to trying something considered radical in this drama filled world.  We are both trying and I give her credit as well. 

I hope in sharing my journey I will provoke a feeling of good in you.  I know we all have tough relationships that we can't just disappear from.  Some might be closer to home and others only on a small scale but if they cause emotions to stir in you then they are worth the efforts to find out why.  I pray that you will be open to what God might have for you in some tough relationships.

Hugs,
Deanna

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Evil Scale

Yes I did get on the scale Monday!!!! No movement what so ever!  142 I'm sticking my tongue out!  Why is losing weight so hard?  I've been working my butt off for two and a half weeks now.  Every time there's a set back, a slip up, getting off the wagon, it puts me that much further away from my goals and dreams.  I know this.  I accept this but why do I do it?  Really? Is it that hard to make good choices on going?  I read a blog yesterday where she said there are NO excuses for poor eating!  URGH!!! She's right and I know it.  You know it but we do it anyways.  I guess that's what make us human.  We have to allow for bumps and then get back to doing what we know is best for our body, mind and soul.   Stop the negative self talk, stop eating garbage, and go back to church.  All these things together get us closer to our goals or further away depending.  I will be positive that the extra effort I'm putting in this week will result in me getting closer to my goal.  I will get back on the scale Monday.  I hope there will be a change by then.
Hugs,
Deanna

Friday, January 13, 2012

Just Dinner update

I for the first time actually didn't get nervous about asking what JM's comment meant.  WOW!  Really? REALLY!  Being the step mom sometimes feels so sticky, tricky and down right uncomfortable.  I have really made a lot personal changes had some major acceptances this last year and feel more confident then ever to feel free to ask about things that come into my home via my stepson or JM.  I still have some area's that I'm not sure I will ever get over but lets focus on the improvements.
Soooo, she says that it was due to her being half asleep still and that's also why she didn't finish the conversation.  That she meant nothing by it but only repeated herself.  She however could totally see how I might get my panties in a bunch over it and probably would have cried if I had sent something like that to her.  Things seem fine and I'm glad.  I still feel a little like it might have been a little bit passive aggressive.  Maybe she doesn't even know she does it.  I will take her at face value so that we can continue try and be on the same team and grow this friendship. 
 
Biggest thing about all this is that I was BRAVE!  And it turned out great!  I was shocked when my heart didn't start beating faster when I knew I was about to ask her to explain it to me.  Usually my heart feels like it's going to jump out of my chest and the tone in my voice gets crackly.  But I stayed calm and direct.  I really wasn't mad maybe that's why.  I just wanted clarification.  And to let her know this wasn't something we had put him up to doing if she was mad about it.  I think that communicating intentions and letting everyone know their side will help clear things up much quicker than assuming.  So far so good, I think!
 
After reading one of the best step/parenting books ever, I guess I've learned that even though I might see things one way, the other woman might have a very different view on it.  I'm glad that JM agreed to read the book and take this adventure on again.  The book I'm referring to is "No One's the Bitch" by Jennifer Newcomb Marine & Carol Marine.  I love it and suggest it to anyone who want to improve relations between themselves and the other woman in their child's life.  Not everyone will become friendly, friends or even get along.  But this book will at least help your state of mind when it comes to dealing with these very tricky situations.  Aren't our kids worth the attempt?  Mine are!
 
Here's the link to the page to read more on them and the community of mom's and stepmoms trying to improve their children's lives:/http://www.noonesthebitch.com/book/
  Hope it helps.  Would love to chat about your experiences with how the book has helped you as well.

Hugs,
Deanna

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Super Yummy!

Good afternoon.  So I'm posting about my yummy success today.  I'm so excited that it was super easy and yummy.  As I've shared low-carb is the way of eating at our home.  We do eat things not considered low-carb when we aren't trying to lose.  But the foundation of our way of eating is low-carb.  Right now with my goals and my hubby on board, I'm committed to finding new things to eat.  So I made chocolate covered macadamia nuts.  So rich you only need a couple to get the chocolate fix.  Which keeps the cal. and carbs low.  I guess you could eat a whole serving or bag but I would be sick or worse cramped up in the bathroom.  (Anyone who has lost control while enjoying sugar-free chocolates know what I'm referring to.)  I think these little nuggets of goodness are perfect though.

So many little nuggets.


This is what I started with.

This is one serving of macadamia nuts, 1/4 C or about 13 nuts.
This is 2 servings of sugar-free chocolate.
I melted the chocolate in a double boiler over very low heat.  This does require some patience.
 I started with just one bag of chocolate.                                                                                                        Each bag contains 2servings each being 5 chocolate bars.
This is what I was left with.


  I did the calculations and figure that with amout of chocolate left over if you were to eat an entire serving you still would be getting less than what I figured.  I don't know how much is in that pot but it leaves the full serving short.  Hey I will take any breaks I can get!  So here's the calculations that I came up with for a 1/4 C. serving:
288- Cal.
2- Carbs (This is countable carbs, not fiber or sugar alcohols)
2- Proteins
28- Fats  (WOW! that's a lot of fat)
I got approximatly 5servings from the bag of chocolate.

My suggestion is to do your own calculations based on the amount of nuts you can actually cover with the serving of chocolate you use.  Best of luck and I highly suggest these!
Hugs,
Deanna

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Birthday dinner disaster

As I mentioned earlier today it's my hubby's birthday.  So being that he never wants anything gift wise for his special day but he always wants me to cook for him, I found some yummy low-carb recipes to cook for dinner.   I really wish he would like me to bake for him cause there is more likely a chance of success.  I wish I had two yummy low-carb recipes to share but they were HORRIBLE!  So bad that I won't even mention where the recipes came from however I found them on my new love, Pinterest.  Hubby actually enjoyed the chicken (thank you God for giving me the good sense to not cover the chicken in the sauce).  He doesn't love chicken in the first place so it's a hit or miss.  The sauce would probably have caused marital problems. Hahaha! And the side dish was way too much effort with no reward. So that's that!  It brought me to tears after all said and done.  I hate cooking and feeling like a failure!  Cooking low-carb and making it interesting, tasty and comforting is a very hard challenge! I can't take too many failures!

Tomorrow's blog will be a success I had with sugar-free chocolate and macadamia nuts.  YUMMO!  It's just been too long of a day to post all of that too.  But I look forwards to sharing it.

Hugs,
Deanna

"Just Dinner" My rant for today, I will post something yummy in my next one.

Ok so one of the topics that I want to be able to share about on here is very sensitive and dear to me, my family.  My hubby and I met 10 years ago and have been married 9yrs this Feb.  We have had many ups and downs with our children’s other parents and this is what I want to share about today.  Today is my wonderful hubby’s 35th b-day.  I hope we have many more to share together!  And yes I married a guy 5yrs younger than me.  Any way we don’t do much and usually don’t request our children’s presence unless there is a “to do”.  There isn’t one today.  However over the weekend my step son made it clear he was going to ask about riding the bus to our home after school so he could have dinner with his dad.  I made no attempt to ask, suggest or speak to his mom (for future reference I will call her JM) about it.  Basically left it up to him to handle.  He’s 12 and some things have been changing so I just let things be.  Let me back track before I go on.  JM and I became friends a few years back and then do to the sensitive nature of our relationship some misunderstandings happened and we discontinued the relationship.  I never felt right about it but we proceeded to fight and things got ugly.  But last summer I decided enough was enough and offered the olive branch one more time.  She accepted and since last August we have been trying to mend our friendship and trying to do this shared parenting thing differently. 
  Soooooo here we are.  Joe (my stepson) took the initiative to be where he wants to be.  No adult discussions took place, we didn’t ask her, or encourage him to do what he did.  But this morning I received a text that made me cringe.  I hope it was nothing but seriously I have to address it with her.  So here’s the conversation in text
Me last night:
Hey I will see you in the morning but its Francis' birthday so no lunch tomorrow either! Sorry I'm such a flake

JM this morning:
Joe said he is riding the bus to ya’lls house today for his bday. For dinner, just dinner. Thats okay about lunch, peyton has hearing test today, I forgot.

Me:
Oh ok :) r u coming to Zumba?

JM:
Not sure, body pump kicked my butt really bad yesterday, I'm so sore!
 Me:
Ok but the moving will help with the lactic acid ;)
No more responses from her and I called to check in after class (we Zumba together) and see if I was reading more into it.  No response on cell and still no return call an hour later.  I’m sorry but really in this day in age, cell phones are attached to folks all the time!  No I don’t believe all relationships have to have an immediate response but this is a very sensitive and personal relationship. It deserves attention.  But that’s me and how I handle things.
Ok so in that conversation do you know what irked me?
This:  For dinner, just dinner. 
REALLY!!!!! Have I just missed something?  We didn’t even ask for this!  I’m not a child, never assumed anything else was happening and why the F. does she feel she needs to reiterate that to me? (Sorry Jesus for cursing!)  See it even makes me loose my sense for a second.   Ok so I’ve just exploded.   I’m done.   Thanks for listening.  I’m sure it’s nothing but a couple of years ago I would have been pissed for days about it and probably not spoken to her about it.  I will though this time, that is if she ever calls me back.  I don’t know what’s going on with her, I do know that she has some big issues she is dealing with but this kind of communication will only hurt our relationship if I don’t say anything or if she really is trying to take a punch at us.  I really hate passive aggressiveness.  I know it too well; I’m pretty good at it so I recognize it right away! Hahaha at least I know it. That’s half the battle. So any way that’s my deal.
  I’m so excited that I have a stepson who is taking the initiative to really be in his dad’s life not just based on what the courts gave his parents. He is a rock star in my eyes and I hope that his parents (all of us) can live up to being the rock stars we all can be!  Our kids are all amazing and have such sticky situations to deal with and so many times I feel like we the adults act like we’re the kids.  I hope we have made some major strides in changing how we deal with these sticky situations.  I know it’s a process.

Hugs,
Deanna

After reading this my sweet level headed hubby says “I think it’s nothing.  Probably just how Joe put it.”  Well isn’t that just like a man!  I gotta laugh and say that yes that did cross my mind.  That’s why I’m not mad but want to at least double check.  Love my man!

Monday, January 9, 2012

Moment of truth and ants!

So I said last week I would face the music on the dreaded eeeevil scale today.  I did.  Not as bad as I guessed it could have been but not what I wanted either.  May I say first before I share that I've come a long way in accepting it's just a number to use a guiding point.  You do need some kind of measure to compare to in order to see that you've made some improvements.  That could be your measurements, it could be your shopping list, it could be that you've switched from regular sodas to diet, whatever it is it's just a starting point.  I also would like to say that on this journey I got down to 130lbs (from my highest being 200lbs) two years ago.  My dedicated weight loss journey started in the spring of 2009 and at that time I weighed 177lbs.  I have always had a hate relationship with my weight and body image.  Does it really take almost mid life to come to some acceptance?
  Sooooo here it is 142.4lbs Like I said not toooo bad.  I weighed 138 before Christmas though.  So that's a little over 4lbs gained.  I had weighed 134 a year ago. I had a particularly rough spring with a fainting spell that I had never experienced before and then put me into a tailspin through the summer.  I was in the middle of accepting that I had son who was about to graduate or possibly NOT!  SCARY!  But he did, thank you Lord.  And then I was faced with making the hard decision to put our youngest back into public school after homeschooling for two years.  I fell in love with that.  But it was our first experience with it and the reasons we had decided to do it were no longer an issue for him.  So mommy needed to put her big girl panties on and let him go.  It was the right decision and I feel like we have been blessed in both decisions. 
  Why I was telling you all this is because I started living my life.  Not just living for the diet and gym.  Putting some weight on is going to happen.  Now it's for me to figure out how not to keep putting on weight and to find a middle ground I'm happy with.  A nice middle would be 134-136.  I think I would be very accepting of that.  My new skinny clothes would always be comfortable and I wouldn't feel so restricted.  But right now I feel bloated and my new clothes don't feel good.
 So there it is.  My reality is that my goal is 8lbs, 10 would be fun for my birthday though.  But that's just not accepting the middle.



Ok on to a fun subject CAMPING!  We took out our new little love this weekend to a park we've been to before.  It has the Colorado River to fish and swim in, a park to climb on, trails, and lots of wildlife!  That's what I want to share about I saw one of the most amazing thing ever.  When Noah and I homeschooled we ordered an ant farm, ya know like we had as kids?  It was so cool but nothing like what we saw this weekend.  TRAILS of ants going through the fields, over the trails and making they're way through anything they wanted.  I wish my pictures showed the depth of the little interstates they had.  In the top picture that's our camper with trails leading to it through the field of clovers. 
These were way cooler than our little ant farm!
These trails were very distinct.  You could see how they had cut the grass and cleared the path.


You can see all the leaf cuttings that they carried to the hole and the hole is huge in comparison to them. 



Noah and Joe were very intrigued by these little workers.
I was amazed by them.   
   
Some other animals we have seen at the park are deer(they didn't a make an appearance this go round and neither did bandit), ducks, cows, alligator gar and this guy or gal.
I had to play with the exposure and color to get the details but I was very close to him.  So cool!
          

So that was our weekend: animals, smores, trails and football.  I love being outside and feel very blessed to have the opportunity to go exploring new campgrounds. This week I hope to follow a low-carb, low expense dinner menu, go to the gym everyday and try making this great phone charger to match my new kitchen decor-http://www.makeit-loveit.com/2011/12/holder-for-charging-cell-phone-made-from-lotion-bottle.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:%20MakeItAndLoveIt%20(Make%20It%20and%20Love%20It)

Wish I had thought of it.  She gives great directions and I will post how mine turns out at the end of the week.
Have a great day!
Hugs,
Deanna





Wednesday, January 4, 2012

SCORE!!!!!!!

Yes I'm dancing the happy dance because not only did I go to the gym and do a new workout that was fabulous, I also made a menu for the rest of the week, and made a dinner my amazing, sweeter than candy hubby said was the best dinner I have ever made!
   SSSCCCOOORRRRRRRRRRRE! 
It's about time after 10years!
 Hahahaha! Whoohoo!!!Yeah Me!!! I did use recipes (all low-carb) But I also put love in and it was really good!  Sorry I didn't take pictures accept of the dirty pans.
 So what was this dinner you ask.  Well it was a marinated fillet of mignon(that was in the freezer). Here's the recipe: http://allrecipes.com/recipe/the-best-steak-marinade
I pan seared it on high heat.  Then moved the steaks to the oven to cook at 400 degrees for 30-45min.  I then put the marinade in the pan and deglazed it and cooked it down. Served the meat with sauce on it.
The next thing was the side and we were going to have broccoli and I needed it to be WOW! Cause we've eaten more broccoli then we care to think about.  I came across this recipe on one of my favorite low-carb sites Linda's Low Carb Menus & Recipes
http://www.genaw.com/lowcarb/mushroom_sauce.html
She had suggested serving this over the broccoli.  It sounded perfect minus the mushrooms (hubby calls them slugs).  It was soooo yummy!  He loved the sauce and couldn't guess what all was in it!  I was so excited!
  So all in all it was a great day!!! I even found a simple bag I think I will try my hand at sewing with.  I will post about that when I get to it.
One more thing.  I mentioned I haven't been on the scale(it's evil).  I think I will on Monday.  That gives me this week to try and cut some water weight and see what the reality is.  I really hope that it's within the 2-3lbs instead of 7-10. And then I will post my weight and the goal I will set for my birthday.  I've been maintaining my weight in my middle range but feel heavy after the holidays.  We will see.
Good night and Hugs
Deanna

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Already lied

OK so I've already made one promise I couldn't keep or didn't (reality is I just didn't do it).  I was going to post about making my first laundry detergent yesterday and didn't.  But I did make it.  Yeah me!  I had fun doing it too.  Even had two little helpers to stir for me.

Joe

And Noah our littlest character.
But I'm getting ahead of my self. 
Not pictured is the Fels-Naptha that I had already shaved into pieces.
So on Jan. 1st, 2012 I did make it.  We gathered the ingredients and started the process.  We watched football and walkers(huge Walking Dead fans) and stirred our little creation.  Fun together.  I was glad to have little hands to stir because I tend to be a little on the strict side of reading directions and rereading directions.  So I could keep researching and rechecking what we were doing as they stirred.  I have to laugh at that because my sweet hubby likes to poke fun at my being a rules girl.  I don't like to "cook" because the recipes seem so intense or tedious where as he likes to create in the kitchen.  I do love to bake however and you pretty much have to follow directions to get the results you hoped for.  Pretty safe I think.  But it's also what got me to 200lbs, more about that on another post.
  So anyways following directions for creating a science experiment is right up my alley.  Really enjoyed it and can't wait to actually use it.  It's just sitting in the tub and I'm thinking I'm going to look for some kind of yummy, clean smelling essential oil to add to it. But as far as I know it looks good.
What do you think?  It has the consistency of snot and no separating.
  I followed a combination of recipes and I ended up using 1C. of the soda, 1C. of the Borax and a whole bar of the Fels-Naptha.  The five gallon bucket isn't filled so I'm thinking it's pretty concentrated.  I will probably be able to use less than 1/2C per load.  I will just have to see.

  OK so on to another note, today the kids went back to school which means I have to get back to my routine. Urghhhhh! I've been working on my health since forever but committed to it almost 3 yrs ago.  So back to the gym I went.  For my favorite class, Zumba, but I just wasn't excited.  But I did it and I was glad I did.  I haven't gotten on the scale since before the Christmas break but I know I haven't eaten well.  To be totally honest I've eaten pretty much every sweet thing in the house without abandon.  And enjoyed every minute of it. But I also didn't go to the gym once during the break.  All progress I made during my return this fall (I had a rough summer)I feel like is hanging on by a thread.  If at all.  So as with my resolution to be more frugal financially, I feel eating less and using my body more will help me be less all the way around. The whole less is more theory.  My hubby has also decided to join me on the new year eat less journey.  So we have set a two month goal (my 40th is in two months) to drop the weight.  I need to lose 10lbs at least and he wants to lose 20lbs. 
  Today we ate low-carb as that is the way he and I both have seen the best results.  He made a wonderful(without a recipe) chicken dinner with a cabbage side.  I wish I could just pull that out my hat.  But that's also why I fell in love with him.  He can pull dinner together from nothing or so I believe.  And we will just leave it at that.  It makes me smile just thinking about the first time he did cook for me.
  I hope you have a fond memory that keeps you connected to your spouse that hasn't changed over the years and still warms your heart.
  Tomorrow I will go back to the gym and try my hand at menu planning for a frugal low carb diet.  Hmmm not sure if the two will go together.  Any suggestions?
Hugs,
Deanna

Sunday, January 1, 2012

It's the beginning

So today is Jan. 1st, 2012 and it's the beginning of my blogging adventure and a new year.  This year I will be turning 40 and with all new things change is always around to try and break you or make you stronger.  I say this because I feel like my life is changing.  My first child graduated last year and I felt the winds of change in my 40th year.  I am looking forwards to it coming to completion or at least a little bit settled.  I made some personal changes in how I look at others and what I really want from them.  I'm starting to take seriously my own needs and stop wanting to please others so much.  Although I'm a long way off. I struggled learning to take responsibility of my health.  Losing the weight 2years ago was much easier than trying to keep it off last year.  With that being said getting to the point of being able to lose the weight was a very hard road and I'm glad I don't have to go through that again if I don't want to.
  I'm not really sure what all I will be blogging about but I know that I've experienced remodeling a home on a budget and we aren't done, parenting 4 kids in a blended mine, his and ours family (but really they are all ours), weight loss, crafting/scrapbooking, and learning new domestic skills.  I hope that I will get better with time at this and I hope to meet new people with similar interests along the way. And as far as a new years resolution I plan on sharing my adventures on being frugal.  Something I need to learn to be more of.  I started today by making my own laundry detergent.  I will share tomorrow what happened.

 So as the saying goes Yesterday is History
                        Tomorrow is a Mystery
                        Today is a Gift
                         That's why it's called
                                  The Present.
Enjoy today for it's the beginning of the rest of your life.
Happy New Year 2012
Hugs, Deanna